Babies, Broken Routines, Night Nappies and Poos

My daughter has developed a new habit in the last week – having a nappy, i.e. a poo, in the middle of the night.

As with any eleven month-old baby, poos are now significantly potent enough that even baby can’t stand the smell. They are so potent in fact that they wake my daughter up.

Coincidentally, it happens about the same time every night. She wakes for one of her (several) night wakes, my wife feeds her and puts her back to sleep and 5 minutes later she wakes with a smelly nappy.

This is yet another example of where we have gotten our night routine into a manageable state – and a new development occurs – usually one that takes us back a few steps.

Babies and routine, especially night routine and getting baby to sleep through the night, is the subject of countless books, journals and articles. There are lots of experts telling us what we should be doing and the perfect technique to achieve the precise routine they outline in their book.

But I don’t think this works. Here is what I have to say about routine and how to get your baby to settle into one:

Be ready to be proven wrong - you may be taken by the latest book you have read, but don’t expect baby to feel the same way about it. Your baby is an individual and will typically respond to what works for them.

Accept that everything is temporary - if you get your baby eating solids without complaint, taking a nap for 2 full hours every day, sleeping through the night following their favorite book – be open to the idea that this will all change. Babies go through phenomenal development in their first few years, and will significantly change in personality over a few weeks and months. Therefore don’t expect them to embrace a routine in month two and keep the same routine a year later

Be ready to experiment - it’s important not to be bound by any book. Read about lots of different routines – whether it is about feeding, sleeping or anything else, and try what you feel works right. It does not have to be exactly what is in the book, it could be a hybrid of ideas or something you find your baby boy or baby girl has responded to well in the past – e.g. a bath before bedtime can be soothing for some babies, but for others it can be sheer trauma

Don’t give up – if routine doesn’t take easily – take a break, go with the flow for a while (baby my come up with their own routine in the meantime) and then try something new

There are a lot of books out there on routine, and most are well known. The one book I will mention here is The Baby Whisperer, which gives you several techniques for looking at routine. There are some specific techniques for very young babies, but the one thing I found about this book is the generic approach to introducing routine has stuck with me for whatever stage we have been with my daughter.